Waking Dreams
by BabyDukes
Summary: A big sister is only as good as the kid brother she raises right? So what happens when our favorite older sister's little brother finally leaves the nest? And why exactly has Kurama suddenly taken a very keen interest in her? Read to find out!
1. 1

Waking Dreams

A/N: I do not own any of these characters or the world they inhabit, just the situations I put them in.

The unlit cigarette rolled lazily between two long, slender fingers. It was an old nervous habit really. One that seemed to resurface whenever a certain someone showed up. Which meant everyday from five to six am for the past two weeks.

"I hope you don't mind my company, Shizuru."

The sweet voice cut through the absorbing silence, startling her out of her reprieve.

"Heh, don't worry about it. All though would it kill ya' to stop by at a time when the sun was actually up, or are you trying to avoid being seen entering my crumby apartment?"

"Oh no Shizuru, I rather enjoy paper thin walls, and various types of vermin. It gives off a rather rustic feel."

His return was polite enough yet seemed sarcastic at the same time. Although his even tone gave away nothing, Shizuru waited to see if he would add a smirk to his comment. A charming smile was given instead. She was starting to rub off on him.

"Why, I'm flattered. I thought the vermin were a nice touch."

"Haha good ol' Shizuru. Your humor is refreshing as always. However.."

A brief glance from green eyes down to a glistening gold Rolex alerted Shizuru to the time. It was six am exactly. Kurama had always been exceptionally good at keeping time.

"Thank you for your hospitality Shizuru, but I must be going now."

And just like that he was gone. If Shizuru didn't know better she would have suspected it was all a dream. It had been just like that lately. At first Shizuru would awaken in the early morning to find Kuruama standing at her door with muffins,or bagels, or some other peace offering. Always with that polite smile. Sometimes giving her compliments on her bed head or morning breath, although those were obvious lies. Soon, after the first few days he stopped bringing peace offerings. A few days after that the compliments stopped. The smile was always in place though. They had fallen into a routine and as soon as Kurama was gone it was like he had never been there before. He floated so effortlessly in and out of her life, and yet he never made any mention of it when they were around the others. The only proof she had of his daily visits were the impression he left in the faded green leather of her only couch and the worn pages of a home improvement magazine, the sole magazine she owned, the pages of which he flipped through everyday. He always looked as if he was reading it for the first time and as if it were the most absorbing thing he'd ever seen. He was odd that way.

* * *

><p>Wet tea leaves slushed back and forth in her empty tea cup, rocked by the rolling motion of her wrist as Shizuru stared into space.<p>

"Shizuru... Umm Shizuru? SHIIIZUUURUUUU!"

"Well geez Botan, I guess I don't need my eardrums, but could you at least try to be mindful of the fact that we're in public?"

The blue haired deity smiled sheepishly as she offered an appeasing meow.

"Well it's not my fault if you were too busy dreaming about Kurama to hear me..."

The heat colored Shizuru's cheeks a faint rose and she tried to look indignant. The delicate floral patterned cup was set abruptly on its saucer.

" And what do you mean by that exactly?"

A knowing looking crossed Botan's faced as she made yet another cat gesture.

"Meow meow."

"Now hold on a minute, who said I was thinking about him?"

"Hmm Oh I don't know maybe it was the completely dazed look in your eyes, or maybe it was the way you're drooling."

Botan grinned triumphantly before taking a bite of buttery golden brown croissant, the crumbs of which stuck to her face.

"My Shizuru if you like him so much why don't you spend some time with him and get to know him better?"

"_If only you knew how much time I spend with him..."_

_ "_Well something tells me no matter how much time I spend with the guy I'll never know him any better than I know him now. It's such an odd feeling being around him. To look at his face and know you're older, and then listen to the wisdom drip off his tongue and feel so much younger. To have him fight for the sake of the world and feel protected, and then watch him fight and feel afraid. To know him and the way he is, but to find out you really don't know him at all."

A silence engulfed them as Botan chewed thoughtfully on her croissant and Shizuru went back to swirling her drained cup.

"It seems as if our green eyed friend is quite the walking contradiction. Although, knowing Yusuke as long as I have I can't say I don't know how you feel. Heh without the wisdom part of course.

Botan's stab at the former spirit detective fell on deaf ears. Shizuru's eyes already regaining the glazed quality they'd had only moments ago. Botan was never one for sitting around though. It was time to do what she had always felt she did best. Boost morale.

" Ohh no matter what you can't give up! Its been too long since I've seen a good romance come together and I won't let the opportunity escape me! "

A ponytail full of blue hair smacked an unassuming waiter in the face as Botan thrust herself from her chair and leaned heavily on the table. Firey lilac eyes looked into Shizuru's brown ones until despite herself Shizuru cracked a smile.

"Botan, my odd friend, it's good to know how high the stakes are when it comes to nosy people butting into my love life."

Quicker than Botan could register what was happening Shizuru's arm flew across the table and snatched up her croissant. The girl could only watch on as her companion took a bite out of the pastry and smiled, both at the deity's disbelief, and the mouthwatering flavor of her food.

"Mmm Botan, you sure weren't kidding when you said they had good food here."

Botans mouth formed the shape of an O as she sat dumbly trying to figure out Shizuru's sudden attitude change.

"But I though you said you weren't hungry?"

"_Kurama if you think for one moment I'm going to let you jumble up my thoughts and emotions and get away with it then you have another thing coming. Two can play this game."_

Shizuru's smile widened at this though and she took in another mouthful of her stolen meal.

"Well I think I suddenly found my appetite."

Botan smirked.

_ And yet another victory for my skills of encouragement. Although... I really wanted that croissant..._

* * *

><p>He was late. Something that was wholly un-Kurama like. The once hot pot of tea she had put on for him was now cold and she had just drained a cup when she could no longer deny her need to use the restroom. Then again five cups of tea in a thirty minute time span could do that to you. Her mind filled with doubt.<p>

_Maybe I was wrong and this really was all a dream. _

Suddenly a familiar spike of demon energy sent Shizuru racing to her living room to find Kurama sitting in his place on her couch. His breaths came out slow and ragged and his face was a sickly yellow color.

"What the hell? Kurama! Are you ok?"

Kurama gave a weak smile before shutting his eyes. His head lolled lazily to the side and Shizuru found herself with a face full of brilliant red hair. An incessant beating sound flooded the brunette's ears and it wasn't until she pressed a shaking hand to her chest that she realized it was the noise of her own heart. With each passing moment of his unconsciousness Kurama's tired form sank further and further into Shizuru's lap until she was cradling him in her arms. From this close proximity she could even smell him. He smelled like a green house, warm with a mixture of various plants,except for the hint of rose she suspected to stem from the flower he kept tucked within his hair. Her face growing hot from the sheer embarrassment of her situation the psychic took several deep breaths before bracing herself for the trip to her bedroom. It became oddly difficult to make it the few yards down the hall when she realized she would be toting a sleep man along with her.

"Uhh today is not my lucky day.."

Shizuru had always felt herself a fairly proficient psychic, but there was no way she could have foreseen this situation.

So.. how is it so far? This is my first Yu yu Hakusho fic so feel free to offer suggestions on characterizations. I mean for this to be canon, but I only watched the anime, so if there is an aspect that is different from the manga I'm just going off what I saw. Please review!

-BabyDukes :)


	2. 2

2.

A/N: Ok chapter two is up, please continue to support this story and thank you for reading :) On with the show!

Kurama had been asleep for a little over six hours and the bright red numbers of Shizuru's alarm clock would have told her it was now twelve in the afternoon had she bothered to check the time. Truthfully it could have been ten at night and Shizuru would still have been there watching him sleep. Back leaning against her bedroom door, an unlit cigarette delicately balanced between two long fingers. She knew it was odd. Watching him sleep that is. If it was the other way around and he had been the one to gaze at her prone form for hours on end she may have felt compelled to call the cops because she would have been majorly creeped out. Thank kami Kurama didn't scare easily, not like she did. The image of Kurama waking to find her standing there and becoming frightened was preposterous, preposterous enough to bring a bought of giggles to her lips. She bit them back. The last thing she really wanted was for him to find her not only watching him sleep, but also giggling like one of Keiko's girly school friends. She had an image to uphold after all. Which was more than she could say of her red headed guest. Most would assume that a guy as cool, calm, and collected as Kurama always seemed to be, would be downright peaceful asleep. But from where she stood they would be wrong. _**Very**_wrong. Kurama's face contorted in painful expression after painful expression and every few seconds he turned this way or that way. Granted that as beautiful a man as he was his scrunched face could almost be considered cute. Cute that is, if she couldn't feel the hurt rolling off him in waves. Unfortunately her spiritual awareness allowed her to feel his pain until she willed herself to turn off the connection. The pain had been so deep and consuming that she couldn't help but wonder how he remained asleep at all. The final straw in her decision to watch him was when she noticed that he had broken out in a feverish sweat. She had desperately wanted to wake him from whatever painful experience he was reliving in his mind, but decided against it. Kurama was too proud for that. Whatever demons he was facing he wanted to face them alone and without anyone ever suspecting him of facing them in the first place. Instead he was now sporting a cool wash cloth across his forehead. All that was left to do was wait. Something was going to happen soon. She could sense it. Almost immediately after the feeling had passed demonic energy that could only have been Kurama's flooded the room. It was familiar and yet different from Kurama's normal energy. Where his typical energy was cool and calming, the energy now was simply cold. A chill ran through Shizuru as she attempted to huddle into herself, briefly considering the wool blankets she kept in her closet.

"Isn't it an invasion of privacy to watch me sleep?"

His words, like this odd new energy were like ice and for a moment Shizuru was caught off guard. Brown eyes appraised him cautiously. Sweeping over his now upright body. He seemed fine. Although for a second his eyes appeared to be glowing yellow. Whatever it was passed eventually and the stiffness in him seeped out, disappearing along with the cold..

"Isn't an invasion of privacy to let yourself into my house and pass out on my couch?"

"Good point."

Red hair spilled over his shoulder and triggered the memory of how she had come to find him sleeping in her arms, warm breath blowing softly on her skin. She could feel her cheeks grow warm with color and she quickly turned her head away in hopes that he would not be able to see her blushing. Although her worry of this subsided as he slumped over slightly, undoubtedly still exhausted. He looked worn and for the first time she could imagine him being thousands of years old. It was in his eyes.

"Thank you Shizuru. I'm sorry."

She exhaled a breath she didn't know she'd been holding and found enough strength in her sore legs and feet to push herself up from her leaning position on the door. The steps she took were slow and measured as she moved closer to her bed. Finally reaching it she sat at what she hoped was an appropriate distance. She then noticed the way her hip accidentally brushed against his knee as he made room for her on the mattress.

"Listen, I don't know why you're apologizing to me, but I hate it when nice guys say sorry for no reason. Guys like Yusuke and Kazuma should basicly be on there knees begging for forgiveness 24/7 cause chances are that they did something wrong anyway. But you, I know you're better than that."

He was avoiding her gaze now. He should have been chuckling like he normally would whenever she poked fun at his friends. Especially Kazuma.

"You really think too highly of me Shizuru."

"I'm sorry you feel that way. Now tell me what's going on."

Her demand seemed to catch him off guard. He had been expecting the apathy that was considered traditional for shizuru and that fact she was interested made him look into her face for the first time that day.

"What do you mean? Nothing is going on."

"Don't give me that Kurama. You've been coming to my house everyday for the past two weeks, when we've barely ever spoken before. And now that you not only managed to let yourself in unannounced, you also pass out in my arms and sleep for six hours! So don't you dare try to feed me that 'Nothing is going on' crap!"

In a flash Kurama was on his feet, damp wash clothing falling into a heap on the floor. Shizuru was sure she had never seen him wear such a grim face. He made his way out into the hall and ever so slightly brushed past Shizuru.

"I'm sorry Shizuru, but the only reason I ever came is because Kuwabara asked me to. Nothing more and nothing less. He worried for you living on your own and enlisted my help in keeping an eye on you. That is all."

"What did you say? Are you telling me that the reason that you kept coming to see me was because my idiot brother asked you to?"

"Kurama continued to walk towards the door. If he could hear her words and the emotions behind them he didn't let on. He soon was opening the door to her apartment and walking out.

"Like I said, I'm sorry Shizuru."

He closed the door softly behind him and suddenly Shizuru was colder than she had ever been.

"I am sooo going to kill Kazuma."

* * *

><p>Kazuma Kuwabara fidgeted nervously with the napkin he held in his hand. Currently both he and his sister were seated in an American style diner. He had ordered a burger and as much as he wanted to enjoy it, he couldn't let his guard down. In all of his years of life, <em><strong>never <strong>_had he and his sister gone out to lunch. Alone. With each other. Only twice had they ever eaten out anywhere together and both those times Yukina was there. What unnerved him even more was the casual way Shizuru picked up a fry and dipped it in her milkshake, biting into it with relish. She _**hated **_diner food, especially milkshakes. Finally gathering up his courage for an apparent beating, he decided to attempt speaking with her.

"So sis, what's up. It's not like you to come to a place like this. And it's really unlike you to come to a place like this with me..."

"I don't know what you mean Kazuma. Isn't this what you wanted? To keep watch over me twenty four seven? You didn't have to sic a spy on me. You could have done it yourself. Or were you to busy to visit the woman who raised you and put you through school?"

He had known something was wrong the minute he sat down and she smiled at him, but this was too much! Kuwabara had never been more confused in his life, and that was saying something!

"What the heck are you talking about Shizuru? I know that you miss me at home, but this is weird, even for you."

"Don't give me that Kazuma. I know all about how you begged Kurama to watch over me now that you moved out. What gives you the right to spy on me? Just because you're in med school and I'm a freelance psychic? Well sorry if my life doesn't live up to your high standards, but I don't need my baby bro to watch after me."

Shizuru finished off her rant with an indignant huff and began to munch angrily on her fries. Kuwabara watched her, anxious of another surprise attack when a light bulb turned on in his head.

"Well geez Shi I didn't think you would be so mad over Kurama volunteering to go check on you."

"What are you saying? Kurama, volunteered?"

"I mean yeah, I guess you could put it that way. I just mentioned how I was worried about your safety since I moved out and you moved into that crappy neighborhood. He told me he would go check on you one of these days. I guess he really annoyed you. I'm sorry about that."

Kuwabara glanced nervously at his sister who had gone oddly quiet.

_Maybe its her time of the month or something..._

"Uh you ok there Shi?"

"Never better."

"Uhh ok."

"Well actually Kazuma could you do me a favor?"

"Yeah... I guess."

Shizuru pushed away the food she had previously eaten,a disgusted look taking distorting her features.

"Do something with this slop. You know I hate diner food."

And just like that she pushed herself away from the metallic counter and hopped off the 60's themed red, white, and blue upholstered stool in one fluid movement.

It was odd, but from her easy going gait and the way she trailed her hand along the counter-top as she walked away Kuwabara could have sworn she was happy. But was it something he said? He looked at her untouched food and began to eat it.

_Nah it couldn't be..._

_-To be continued_

What did you think guys? Better than the last chapter? I hope so. Thank you so much for your support. Please review.

-BabyDukes


	3. 3

_'Kurama'_... His name slipped off her tongue like water. He was an enigma, a mystery, and she hadn't seen his face in five days. It was odd that he had lied about his reasons for seeing her, unlike him to ignore her calls, strange that no one else had heard from him either, but downright perplexing that he hadn't spoken to his mother since a week ago. She hadn't thought that Kurama went more than a day without speaking to Shiori. It seemed as if she was the last one to have had any contact with the redhead at all. An odd fact considering that she probably had the least amount of contact with him overall. If Kurama was hiding something he was doing an excellent job of it. The guy had practically fallen of the face of the Earth. Not entirely implausible if it was remembered that he was truly a demon. '_Demon'._The memory of their last encounter entered Shizuru's mind for the third time that day. The way his demonic energy chilled her to the bone and his glowing yellow eyes felt as if they were burned into her subconscious. There was no way she could forget the way it felt to see him like that. However, more than scared, she felt worried. All of the signs were saying that something was wrong with Kurama and as soon as she realized it he had disappeared. Shizuru growled inwardly. The next time she saw Kurama she was really going to let him have it. _'Kurama'_... There was that feeling again. Like his name was water on the tip of her tongue. It almost felt as if she could close her eyes and feel him next to her again. Shizuru slowly leaned her head back and closed her eyes. '_Kurama'_. There he was. Right next to her. His red hair spilling onto her shoulder, his earthy smell warping her senses, his breath hot and heavy on the nape of her neck. So close she could feel his heart beating. Suddenly her eyes snapped open. It wasn't _'like' _She could feel him. She _'could' _feel him. There were no thoughts or questions as Shizuru snatched up her purse and slung it over her shoulder. The door to her apartment was even left slightly ajar in her haste. Without a doubt she knew Kurama needed her.

* * *

><p>Being a poor freelance psychic Shizuru couldn't help but feel out of place in the swanky condominium building. Where on Earth did Kurama get the money to afford this place, and how could he stand the attitudes of the people there? The elevator ride up to Kurama's floor had to be the most uncomfortable one she had ever been on. It wasn't the first time she had been in an upscale environment and she didn't need to be psychic to understand the 'you dont belong here' stares. It was making her feel irritable to say the least. Something about the golden glow of the the lights and the way she could see her reflection in the tile of the lobby had put her on edge. Luckily for everyone in the elevator, especially the old lady giving her the stink eye, the glossy mahogany doors slid open right before she was about to speak her mind. With a final backwards glare Shizuru stalked out of the elevator and down the hall, brown hair swaying back and forth with the force of her frustration. After walking a few doors down the young woman stopped finally in from of a door marked 12B. She had never visited Kurama's home before but she knew he lived there by the chill she felt when she passed his door, which was unlocked. It made sense though. Why would Kurama need to lock his door? Anyone stupid enough to break into the home of one of the most powerful demons alive would probably be less than pleased with their results. As she stepped cautiously inside a brief look around the space confirmed that Kurama was not home. She expected that though. Nothing she did could ever be that easy. The condo was exactly as she had imagined. Clean, spartan and gave absolutely nothing away about the man who lived there. All in all about the only furniture he seemed to own was a brown leather couch and a coffee table. Probably a bed too, but she couldn't see his room. Though she doubted he used this place as much more than a place of rest. To find Kurama she would need to follow his trail of spiritual residue from a place where it was fairly concentrated and almost immediately she knew that she had come to the right place. As soon as she closed her eyes she was bombarded with him. It was like she was pressed against him and she could feel everything, even thoughts. Fragmented wisps of his thoughts slipped in and out of her brain. Not enough to read his mind, but enough to feel the emotion behind them. It was slowly becoming a struggle not to be overcome by his essence. Suddenly her attention became caught on a particularly strong strand of his subconscious. It pulled and tugged at her, fading into a faint sensation before surging to the forefront of her mind again. Shizuru focused her efforts on it and pushed those other thoughts into the background for the time being. This feeling that was slowly engulfing her was angry and doubtful. Kurama's brown knit together in frustration popped into her mind's eye. Directly following the image was a sense of sorrow. She had had enough. With a shake of her head Shizuru pulled herself from Kurama's subconscious and once again left the door ajar in her haste away.<p>

* * *

><p>She should have known he'd be here, she berated herself. The forest was just outside of the city. He was always somehow drawn to areas with few people. A cold fog slowly began to roll in and Shizuru could only hope that it was a sign she was getting closer. She could definitely feel him more strongly. His spiritual energy was so strong now that she had to let it go to prevent the headache that normally accompanied holding onto the spiritual energy of one so close. The fog grew thicker and what light or warmth there was was nearly nonexistent. The only thing she could see was the shimmer of what appeared to be spun silver. Silver? Shizuru rushed forward with all the energy that hadn't been zapped by the unusual atmosphere and found on the ground before her a heavily sleeping Yoko Kurama. Silver hair fanned around him, prone form strewn innocuously over the barren ground. His breath escaped in short puffs and it seemed as if he was having one of his nightmares again. The visible clenching of his jaw beging the first thing to alert her to his less than pleasant dreams. As her eyes roamed over the sleeping fox's demon form Shizuru was unable to keep from noticing the differences. Yoko Kurama's form was lean, but obviously powerful. His arms tensed and flexed involuntarily, displaying the thick rope of muscle tightly coiled beneath the surface. While she knew Kurama's other form was not scrawny, this form appeared to have the body of an olympic swimmer. Not only that, but he was taller as well she noticed not too enthusiastically. By at least seven inches. How the heck was she supposed to pick him up? It was that or call someone for help. She was sure that Kurama would rather lay there helpless than let one person know that he was struggling so much. He would probably be less than thrilled that she knew, though it was more his fault than hers. Who told him to act all weird around a psychic? She glanced down once more and this time she noticed his face. It was much more angular than the Kurama's she was accustomed to. Looking at this face she could see the cold calculating Kurama that the others knew. How much of himself had he been hiding from her? As she peered into his sleeping face Shizuru felt her body lowering itself onto her knees, but was less than aware of it. She brought a hand up to his face, and more delicately than even she knew she could, brushed a strand of hair away from his cheek leaving her palm resting there in its stead. She chuckled softly to herself before whispering.<p>

"What would Kazuma say if he could see me now?"

She had always been more of the type to think out loud.

"I doubt he would know what to say."

The chuckle evaporated in the air as amber suddenly clashed with vibrant yellow. The voice that had come from Yoko Kurama was indeed the voice of Yoko Kurama, yet the hardness of the tone surprised her. She had half been expecting it to still be Kurama's gentleness beneath his transformed exterior. Left speechless for one of the few times in her life, Shizuru sat dumbly trying to figure out what happened as her hand instinctively cradled Yoko Kurama's head and helped him into a sitting position. He gave her a sharp look once he was up and she pulled her hand away as if burned, making a mental note of how he winced trying to sit up. For a moment she waited. He was obviously in terrible condition and he was breathing fairly heavily. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again. He spoke instead.

"You shouldn't be here."

"You're hurt."

"How did you find me?"

"I could feel your spiritual energy."

Pause. He was winded again. Shizuru sat patiently as she watched him, watch her. As his yellow eyes appraised her she could almost see how quickly he was calculating this new development. Silently he forced himself from the ground into a standing position and Shizuru followed suit, albeit, with much greater ease.

"You need to leave."

He turned away from her then and Shizuru did something that she immediately regretted. She reached out and grabbed his hand. As soon as she did that the air gained a foreboding chill that made her spine tingle. His back still facing her though, Shizuru felt herself emboldened.

"You need to leave too. Only an idiot would keep pushing himself like this when its all he can do to pass out all over the place!"

Faster than she expected he whipped around to face her, face glowing with rage, yellow eyes alight. His hand had now caught hers in an iron grip and she mused at the irony of the act. Even at his weakest he was still strong enough to hurt her.

"You know nothing of what I must do!"

Shizuru fruitlessly tried pulling her hand from his grasp but eventually gave up. If it meant he would stop doing whatever it was that was causing him so much pain then she thought it was worth it. He still needed her help.

"I'm not going to let you destroy yourself! You're lucky I found you. What if some monster had found you instead?"

"I can take care of myself. You would do well to stay out my way."

Yoko Kurama released her hands and began to walk away. Shizuru slowly rubbed the painful place where he had held her. It was probably going to bruise.

"I'll tell the others."

Just barely above a whisper. Kurama froze in his tracks and Shizuru repeated herself louder this time.

"I'm going to tell the others that something is wrong with you if you don't agree to talk to me yourself."

He hadn't spoken a word, but Shizuru could tell he understood.


	4. 4

Kurama's breathing had slowed and he took fewer pauses between his pockets of rage or indignation to catch his breath. He was also having fewer pockets of rage or indignation. Over all things had returned to a point of, somewhat, normalcy between the two. In fact, Kurama looked as normal as he ever had by Shizuru's standards, if you didn't count his eyes still being yellow that is. Despite his outward appearance, however, Shizuru could tell that he was still weak. He now sat in his spot on her faded green couch, holding, but not drinking, the best tea she had (A Christmas gift from him actually), swaddled in a wool blanket that Shizuru had practically been forced to tie him up with. Needless to say their conversation had yet to pick up momentum. Shizuru took another sip of tea before placing it on the worn coffee table and fixing Kurama with a hard stare.

"So you're saying that you've been transforming into Yoko Kurama against your will and you're also unable to change back for long periods of time?"

She was met with silence that she accepted as a sign that she was right. It was hard to tell though. He hadn't met her eyes once since they left the forest and she was losing patience with him. Demon fox or not, she didn't run around town frantically for half the day just so she could drag him out of the forest to sit on her couch.

"Damn it Kurama, answer me! Tell me what the heck is going on with you!"

Shizuru had pushed herself to her feet and was now standing directly in front of the silent red head. Her face now inches from his own, she became aware of how she must look to him. In her panic to find him that morning things like appearance went unremembered. She hadn't actually brushed her hair or attempted to wear matching shoes. She was just thankful she always brushed her teeth first thing in the morning. Especially since he was facing her now. Watching her unflinchingly with those green eyes. She realized it was almost as unusual for her to lose her cool as it was for him. She was typically one of the more level headed members of their group. Time slowed to a stand still. Neither breaking eye contact. Shizuru didn't know how many seconds had gone bye, but she was beginning to feel a little silly. Once her heart stopped pounding so furiously there seemed to be less and less of a reason for her to be locked into a staring contest with him. Actually, she couldn't think of one single reason why neither had moved. Yet, there they were. A hand smooth and pale came up to clutch her own. Its grip becoming frighteningly tight, though there was none of the earlier anger in Kurama's eyes. That reminded her, when had they become green again?

"You're human Shizuru. You, despite your tough exterior, are fragile. I could break you so easily. In my human form I am in control. However, in my demon form, while I am in control... I have certain, urges, that may prove to be detrimental to your and every other human's health."

A pause. He released her hand and turned away from her once more. A rueful expression shadowing his face. Shizuru didn't even bother to rub where he had gripped her. It was definitely going to bruise. Suddenly Shizuru felt her stomach lurch. Kurama hadn't mentioned anything that could possibly harm him. So why was he in such bad shape? The only possible answer something that made her feel sick.

"I can not surpress my Yoko Kurama form and each time I transform I stay him a little longer than the time before."

"Kurama. Have you been... hurting yourself somehow?"

Kurama chuckled darkly before lifting his gaze back to Shizuru, a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of his upturned lips. Something danced beneath the green and for a reason unknown to her, she suddenly felt herself wholly afraid of what he had to say.

"I have."

His eyes never left her face and Shizuru briefly wondered if it was Yoko Kurama that hid behind Kurama's eyes. That scared her more than anything.

"Did I miss the part where you went emo or something?Why on Earth would you do that to yourself?"

"Not exactly. My body can only hold that form for so long, even if it is longer than I would desire. I change back into my human form when I become too fatigued. I am simply speeding up the process, but this can't go on. As I'm sure you've seen."

She wanted to say something witty. Something wise that would somehow help him, but nothing sprang to mind. His nonchalance about beating himself to the point of unconsciousness on a regular basis was more than disturbing, but there wasn't anything she could do, was there? Her brain ran through everything she knew about Kurama. His voice, his demeanor, his personality, his thoughts... His '_thoughts_'. Kurama's emotions had flooded her brain the last time she had thought about him. Slowly it dawned on her. The emotions she felt earlier were '_Yoko Kurama's_ ' emotions. She knew how he was feeling when he was Yoko Kurama.

"What if I could help you?"

Kurama eyes narrowed very seriously and a small frown replaced the earlier smile.

"Shizuru, I don't think you-"

"Just listen ok? When I was looking for you I didn't just feel your spiritual energy, I could also feel your thoughts. Or more like the emotions behind them- Whatever, the point is that I could feel what Yoko Kurama was feeling."

This situation began to excite her in a way that nothing else had for a long time. Once Yusuke had returned everything had settled down for Shizuru. Without the excuse of having to look out for her baby brother she wasn't needed anymore. Not by Kazuma, not by anyone. Not only that though. It was about more than helping Kurama. It was more than his early morning visits. This was something '_intimate_'. Kurama must have been thinking along the same lines as his female companion because his face morphed into an unreadable expression. Shizuru was still standing in front of him and once again she noticed their closeness. Her face not so close to his as before, but still within range to feel the soft sigh he breathed brush lightly across her cheek. Why had she gone looking for him? He had everything worked out just fine (minus the beating himself to a pulp part) and she had to butt into his problems and create... Well whatever this was. Honestly it was all a headache. She had been perfectly content to ignore the way his green gaze made her feel warm, or the way her stomach tied itself into knots when a friend mentioned him, even the way her skin tingled whenever his hand brushed against her was casually overlooked. Why couldn't she ignore this? She couldn't let go of the way she was feeling and it was really freaking annoying. Geez why couldn't her stupid heart just leave her be? While Shizuru reprimanded herself; Kurama leaned back into the couch and closed his eyes. He was obviously deep in thought, staying like that a few seconds before reopening his eyes and looking up to the ceiling.

"Well, I suppose you're right. It would probably be a great help to know what I'm feeling during those times. Its ironic, that I can't determine my feelings myself, but lately... There seems to be some sort of disconnect between Shuichi and Yoko Kurama."

His face was still pointed towards the ceiling and despite his youth, the age the of his spirit was visible in his face. He sighed again before facing her.

"You know, if I can't control this, I'll have to return to the demon world."

The resigned look on his face and his tone of finality was enough to cause Shizuru to pull a slender cigarette from the crumpled box she kept in her pocket. The twirling motion came naturally to her fingers and the cigarette was rolled carefully, almost lovingly, between them.

* * *

><p>Time had spun by it seemed, absorbed by his worries and her fears. Neither of which they were willing to speak of out loud. It was late. Much later than Shizuru had intended to keep him. It was never a good time to spend too much time around Kurama. His presence was so disarming that she nearly forgot to guard herself from him. While the murky light outside her window quietly crept away to be replaced by an increasingly inky night, a brief glance at the quiet man told Shizuru that he was still considerably weak. She wasn't sure how often he transformed, but the possibility of him becoming Yoko and forcing himself back to his human form in his current condition made her worry.<p>

"Its getting late. You should sleep here tonight. You can have the couch."

The words were spoken as casually as she could manage while still letting him know that it was more of an order than anything. He was too weak and tired to fight her on this anyway. He neither moved nor spoke. His eyes were cast downward and she thought he resembled a petulant child after being reprimanded. The sparsely stocked linen closet in the hallway was only a few steps away, yet turning her back on him for the few seconds it would take for her to reach it and bring back a pillow and blanket could mean a repeat of how she found him earlier. Finding a motionless Kurama on the ground was not something she wanted to relive. Making sure her steps were measured and even, she turned and started towards the cabinet. Between each step she paused and listened for something, anything, that would alert her to his departure. When she returned she found him with his eyes closed and his torso slouched forwards, sleeping peacefully for once.

Placing him into a decently comfortable position on the couch allowed his hair to tickle her skin and she was unsure if the warmth on her face was from her cheeks or his breath. Once the two blankets covered him protectively and she had given one last backwards glance to him before turning off the single lamp, Shizuru was finally ready to sleep.

* * *

><p>It was cold. Unnaturally so. But she wasn't shivering. There was something in the air that she couldn't quite place. It was like someone was watching her, but who? Shizuru's eyes opened onto the smoky darkness of her room. Squinting she sat up and leaned forward. Peering warily into the black. All was still, but out of the corner of her eyes she could swear she saw something glowing.<p>

"Kurama?"

She was answered in silence, but she could feel him. It was like she could hear his heart beating. She decided to try again.

"You couldn't sleep?"

Again only silence. Shizuru wrapped her arms around herself in an attempt to regain some warmth. What the heck was going on?

"Ok Kurama I don't know what you're doing, but its fairly creepy."

She outstretched her hand to the night stand for the lamps light switch.

"Don't."

A voice cool and low spoke out from the darkness. A blurred outline of what she could only assume was Kurama's figure leaned against her door frame. Though he was taller now. Yoko remained silent, but she could just make out his shadowed form move towards her. With each step he took she felt herself growing colder and colder until he stood directly in before her, their earlier roles reversed.

"Yoko, you-"

"You can feel my spirit can't you?"

For the third time that day Shizuru felt her hand held by Kurama. This time, however, the touch was soft. Her hand was raised over his chest. As she placed her open palm over his heart she was almost surprised to find his skin warm to the touch in contrast to the ice she was expecting.

She could feel the beat of his heart as she had always felt it, but beneath it there seemed to be something else. Something she had never felt before. Shizuru's eyes widened and alarm washed over her. Her hand curled into a ball and fisted into the thin material of his shirt, at the same time she leaned over and flicked on her bedside lamp.

"Kurama!-"

He was gone. Her hand, still balled into a fist, now empty like the room around her.


	5. 5

It wasn't often that Kazuma Kuwabara visited his sister's apartment. He thought the people in her building were weird. That and he wasn't invited very often to begin with. Despite these things, he now stood outside Shizuru's peeling door with a bag of her favorite fresh onion bagels. He doubted she would be awake at this time, but he had made a copy of her key incase a situation like this ever occurred. When Kuwabara walked into the small apartment he frowned. It was obvious from the blanket wrapped lump that his sister had fallen asleep on the couch again. Even though he had tried to warn her that the beat up furniture was awful for her posture, she never seemed to listen to him, something about him being a "know-it-all med student". Kuwabara quietly approached his sleeping sister, reaching a hand out to lightly rest on her shoulder (which felt unusually firm) and began to gently shake her.

"Uh Shi. Wake up. Shi! I brought bagels they're-"

He didn't manage to mention they were onion before she rolled away from his grasp and the movement allowed a few strands of red hair to poke out from beneath the blanket. Kurama.

The action was quick, but there was no doubt that Kuwabara had meant his fist to connect with the face of the sleeping red head and not sink into the squishiness of his sister's couch. In fact Kurama had only narrowly escaped Kuwabara's wrath by use of his heightened sense of awareness. The fuming boy loomed over him, huffing and puffing with the righteous fury of brotherly love. The mere idea of a man sleeping a few feet away from where his sister slept was already maddening. Having that man be a friend of his who also happened to be the flame of desire for every girl aged 18-25 within a 10 mile radius was even worse, much worse. From what Kuwabara could tell the fox demon was a prolific womanizer. It was a rare time that there wasn't a flock of girls following him around, hanging on his every word, and now it seemed that his poor sister had fallen for him as well. It was up to Kuwabara to protect her dignity and her heart like any good brother would, by beating Kurama's face in. Unfortunately Kurama didn't see it that way and kept dodging his fist. It was more than a little frustrating.

"KUUUURAAAAMAAAAA! Hold still so I can kill you!"

Kurama jumped away from the couch and Kuwabara's speeding fist in one fluid movement. He'd barely anytime to flinch inwardly over the image of Shizuru's destroyed couch before being forced to flit off out of harm's way again. This was getting out of hand and he knew that Shizuru would be a force to be reckoned with whenever she emerged from her room. He had readied himself to catch Kuwabara's fist, but paused when he felt her enter the room. Kuwabara, however, seemed to be completely unaware and pulled back his fist to launch another attack. Though Kurama had braced himself to dodge once more Kuwabara's fist never came. Instead a loud 'thwack' rang through the room.

"Anyone care to explain to me what exactly is going on here?"

Shizuru's less than pleased tone emphasized her annoyance over the situation and Kurama turned around to find Kuwabara rubbing soothingly at the spot that had taken Shizuru's sisterly brand of punishment. Kuwabara's face donned an appeasing smile and he help a large brown paper bag out in front of him.

"H-hey sis, good to see you. I, uh... Brought you bagels..."

Shizuru took the bag from his shaking hand and gave a few approving sniffs before raising an eyebrow at her brother. He had obviously been doing something she would disapprove of and judging by the atmosphere of the room that something involved violence towards Kurama.

"Now want to tell me why you found it necessary to scream death threats at Kurama at eight in the morning Kazuma, or will I have to beat it out of you."

Truthfully she had become accustomed to being awoken at a much earlier hour and had been laying awake for quite sometime. Not like he needed to know that though. Guilt was the best tactic when it came to getting information out of Kazuma.

"Well you see Shi, I was kinda just popping in to say hi, when I found Kurama sleeping on your couch. Guess I sort of overreacted a little, huh?"

Shizuru looked over at her couch. She hadn't thought notice it before, but if she had Kuwabara would be sporting a lot more lumps that the one she had given him to start with. There were three large holes in old leather of the cushions and at least two pairs of foot indentations in the armrest. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she pointed a long finger towards the door.

"Go"

The command was relayed in a none too gentle tone and Kuwabara crossed his arms, his face cracking a victorious smile.

"You heard her Kurama. You should get going."

Shizuru's eyes snapped open and she looked incredulously to her brother.

"Not him you moron. You. You're the one who put a bunch of holes in my favorite couch!"

"B-but I brought-"

"Out!"

Kuwabara sheepishly dragged his feet towards the door. Jealously looking at the man who'd put him in his sister's bad graces. 'I need to find Hiei'.

Once the door closed Shizuru's gaze turned to Kurama. She looked him over silently, before deciding to speak.

"We need to talk."

* * *

><p>Kuwabara slumped unenthusiastically into the forest. The place gave him the creeps, but he knew that it was Hiei's favorite hangout. Hiei was more of a grouchy little pain in the butt than a real friend and he probably wouldn't welcome Kuwabara very warmly. Although, that seemed to be the way his friendships were these days. Sure enough a small black foot hung down from a dense canopy of leaves and as Kuwabara approached he could see the small demon was perched casually on a long thick branch.<p>

"Hey Hiei! Get down here I gotta talk to you."

Hiei cast a bored look down at Kuwabara, but made no move to leave his branch.

"Why would I want to subject myself to any of the useless drivel you call speech?

As usual Hiei knew exactly what buttons to push. Below him on the ground a fuming Kuwabara glowered up at him.

"Well fine then! I guess you don't want to hear about Kurama's little crush. See if I care."

Before Kuwabara could make a full turn and stalk away, Hiei left his branch and blocked his path. Kuwabara did not appear to be leading him on and he doubted that Kuwabara even had the mental capabilities to concoct such a story. That meant that it had to be true. It also meant that the female was likely human,which could prove to be a more tiresome complication than Hiei felt like dealing with.

"What do you mean that Kurama has a crush? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. What woman could possibly distract him in such a way?"

Kuwabara stood up to his full height and smirked. The smug look on his face was enough to tempt the fire demon with smacking him, but he also wanted information. If Kuwabara had such a stupid look on his face it must mean that Kurama's crush was something Hiei would find at least fairly interesting.

"Well don't just stand there with that idiotic look on your face, tell me who she is."

Kuwabara paused another moment, drinking in Hiei's obvious frustrations. He wasn't pleased with the situation, but he was glad that he could at least annoy the crap out of Hiei. Which almost made him feel better about Kurama and Shizuru.

"My sister."

A look of indifference adorned Hiei's face.

"What about you sister?"

"Kurama's in love with her. I found him asleep on her couch and they were looking at each other kind of funny."

For a moment Hiei was silent. He was waiting for Kuwabara to announce his childish joke and tell him who the girl really was, but the seconds ticked by and Kuwabara said nothing. Obviously he believed what he was saying, but Hiei highly doubted that he could believe the information he was being told.

"You can't possibly be serious."

"And why can't I?"

It was Hiei's turn to smirk.

"Well let's just say that Kurama has more, elegant, taste than - your sister."

Kawabara grabbed the demon by his collar and pulled him to his face, eyeing him angrily.

"What are you trying to say? That Kurama couldn't be interested in my sister because she's not classy enough?"

At this Hiei pushed away Kuwabara's hand and adjusted himself. Neither moved from their close proximity and the two continued to stare each other down. Hiei fixed the red head with an almost bored look before answering.

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

An audible clash rang through the trees as sword met sword. Both pushing the other with such equivalent force that they became interlocked, neither willing to budge so much as an inch. It made Kuwabara wonder briefly why he had the kind of friends that were always ready for a fight. It was kind of masochistic when he thought about it. Letting out a sigh he deactivated his spirit sword.

"Fine don't believe me. Ask Kurama about it yourself."

As Kuwabara turned to leave Hiei silently cursed Kurama's soft human emotions.

* * *

><p>Across the city Kurama lay on his back staring up at the smooth white ceiling of his condo. Thoughts of his conversation with Shizuru raced through his mind. It seemed as if whatever had taken place the night before had left her very worried, about him no less. Then again he had entered her room without her permission in his Yoko Kurama form. It was natural for her to be worried. It made him worry too. If he couldn't even recall where he went or what he did when in his Yoko form there was no telling what he could do without his knowledge. That scared him more than anything. He also had the inkling that she was keeping something from him. Just before he left her apartment she had lightly grabbed his arm and asked him to be careful. Actually, with the look she was giving him at the time it was more like she was pleading with him. He didn't like that either. It wasn't her job to look out for his safety. It was his job and his responsibility and the way that she was worrying herself over him made him feel guilty. He should never have taken to seeing her. It had been selfish of him to get her involved. Now he doubted she would let him pry her away from the situation. She didn't seem to be the type he could tell what to do, not that he didn't appreciate that about her. Slowly the weight of his eyelids became too much for him to carry and his eyes began to close. His hand came to rest on the spot where she had touched his arm and his thoughts began to drift to places where she might smile at him while she did it. His thoughts were disrupted and his eyes snapped open to find Hiei standing beside him. In his state of thought he hadn't noticed his friend enter the room.<p>

"Having sweet dreams are we, Kurama? Of a certain psychic perhaps?"

Kurama's eyes narrowed at Hiei's implication. Hiei was perceptive, but he couldn't read minds, at least not if Kurama didn't want his to be read.

"What do you know Hiei?"

"Oh just that the oaf, Kuwabara, caught you asleep on his sister's couch. He said you two seemed to be behaving in a rather intimate way."

Kurama cursed himself. It had never occurred to him that the reason Kuwabara had attacked him that morning was because he assumed... That. Leave it to Kuwabara to get it wrong, but get it right at the same time.

"We did not sleep together, if that's what you think."

"Oh I didn't think you two had been doing much sleeping. I'm surprised she put you on the couch though. I thought human females liked to cuddle."

"I'm serious Hiei. We did nothing of the sort."

At that point Hiei examined his friends face. He scoffed.

"You've got to be kidding me Kurama. You actually like this girl? Not only is she a human, she's Kuwabara's sister. Surely you've thought about the consequences."

Red hair slipped over Kurama's shoulders as he turned his face to the floor.

"I have. More than you know. You needn't worry too much though. Nothing will happen between us as long as I am in control."

"And if you aren't in control?"

Kurama turned an incredulous gaze to the fire demon who's own face gave away nothing.

"You know?"

Hiei shrugged.

"I've suspected. You shouldn't get too close to her."

"I know."

Though they came from his mouth the fox demon had difficulties convincing himself of his words.


	6. 6

"I have to go."

A fantom wind blew the hair from her eyes and she could now see him clearly. He looked odd. Expressionless almost. He said nothing else and they both just seemed to be staring. Looking in a way that was both at each other, and also past each other. She wanted to speak to him, but at the moment she was distracted by his appearance. It seemed as if his hair color was changing between a glowing silver and a flaming red. Was it a trick of the light?

"Where are you going?"

Hiseyes flickered green and yellow. Back and forth. Just like his hair. He was slowly seeming to get farther and farther away. As he drifted she could feel her feet move beneath her and start to run towards him, but she was too slow. She was far too slow to catch him and yet she was still chasing him. She outstretched a hand to grab him. Anything to make him stay just a little bit longer. Long fingers stretched till the tendons in each were sore before they dug into... Nothing. Her hand slipped right through him and she tumbled to the ground.

"Where are you going?"

A little above a whisper.

"Where are you going?"

She wanted to scream it. She wanted to yell so loud that her voice cracked and her throat went dry. If it would make him stay she didn't care. So why couldn't she reach him? No matter how much she wanted to be louder her stupid cries were still too quiet and he just kept getting farther and farther away. He had to listen. He had to hear her, dammit!

"Where are you going?!"

Sunlight bleached the already bare white walls of the room around her. Shizuru found herself splayed on her back, staring up at the ceiling. It had happened again. This time more vivd than the last. Her dreams of him had been growing more and more realistic lately. So real that it took a few moments of lying awake to realize that she had been dreaming. She curled into herself and attempted to go back to the place inside her mind where she'd last seen him.

_Beep beep beep_. The sound of her cell phone going off jolted her thoughts into a frantic post-awakend state. A tired hand grasped the beeping phone, but the name displayed on the glowing led cell phone screen caused an abrupt attempt to blink away the sleep. It was Kurama. The only thing that prevented her from whipping the phone up to her ear and answering in a breathless mix of excitement and anxiousness was her pride. And even that only restrained her enough to wait a few seconds in order to allow her a chance to force an tone of apathy in her voice before she finally did answer.

Kurama's voice seeped through the speaker and pooled into Skizuru's ear with a warm silkiness.

"Hello? Shizuru?"

She was hesitant to answer him. She realized that Kurama was extremely perceptive and would notice immediately that something was going on with her if she couldn't get it together. The last thing she wanted was for him to worry about her worrying about him.

"Hey. Kind of early for a phone call isn't it."

She took a deep breath. So far so good. Even she was almost convinced that his phone call didn't mean anything to her"

"Maybe, but I was hoping to catch you before you made plans for tonight. Are you free?"

"Free? Well, I guess I am... Is something going on? This isn't one of Yusuke's lame 'let's go out and get drunk' parties is it?

"No not exactly. It's more for the two of us.

"The two of us? Like a, a... oh... OH."

Was this, was he? It couldn't be could it?

"I'll text you the directions. Can you make it?"

The sound of her furiously beating heart was nearly all she could hear. For the brief moment that followed his question. The world seemed to stop and turn on its side before once again beginning its usual rotation. Her relationship with Kurama had only recently become closer, and even now it was merely platonic. He was making it more and more difficult to be ignored and she wanted to be frustrated. She didn't want to feel the tickling wings of the butterflies in her stomach. And she certainly didn't want to release the nervous bought of giggles that threatened to spill forth from her mouth.

"Shizuru? Do you think you'll be able to make it?"

"Yeah, of course - I mean... Sure. I guess"

Her usual tone of indifference had melted away to reveal the fluttering, nervous wreck, that had become her mind.

"Ok. I'll see you later then."

The line went dead and the phone slipped from her hands which were still curled from clutching it. Her heart was racing and her mind was blind with excitement. It was wonderful and terrifying all at once. Kurama had asked her out. Kurama who was easily smarter than any one she'd ever met before. Kurama who was easily one of the most handsome men she'd ever met. Kurama who was both older than her and younger than her. Kurama who was one of her annoying younger brother's most trusted friends. Kurama who kept everyone at an arms length and let no one see any weaknesses. Kurama who was dangerous. Kurama who was secretive. Kurama who was a demon and her opposite and her mirror reflection all at once. That Kurama, the very same one, had just called to ask her out on a.. a... one of those, and it felt like nothing she'd ever felt before. Shizuru grinned despite herself. She hated to feel this way for any man, and especially one of Kazuma's friends at that, but she couldn't stop the sheer giddiness that swelled within her at the thought of what had just occurred. She wanted to shout, and laugh, and jump, and giggle, and go tell that annoying girl at the end of her hall that she could get a... one of those and it had just been a choice not to all along, just like she said, and, and... She wanted everything and nothing at all. It didn't feel real. Behind all of the joy she felt there was also fear. How many times had she dreamt of him slipping through her fingers. He had been so close last time and she still couldn't reach him. Shizuru let her body fall limp as she dropped backwards onto her bed.

* * *

><p>Kurama let out a sigh. He was dreading what he was about to do, but it had to be done all the same. He dialed the number swiftly and lifted the phone to his hear again.<p>

" Kuwabara? It's Kurama. Do you have a minute? I think there's something we need to talk about."

Kuwabara shifted uneasily against the supple leather surface of Kurama's couch. He had been sitting in awkard silence with the fox demon for what felt like an eternity, but was more like ten minutes. In fact he doubted Kurama had said more than "Please come in." to him. Kurama wasn't a talkative guy to begin with, but for some reason it seemed as if he was restraining himself from speaking, rather than lacking something to say. A glance towards the redhead told him they were no closer to a conversation than before. Releasing a heavy sigh, Kuwabara finally turned to Kurama and spoke.

"Erhm... Listen Kurama, about what happened at Shi's place, I didn't mean to attack you like that. I just saw red. Literally. Heh heh.

Kiwabara gave a quick glance towards Kurama's vibrant locks hoping to lighten the mood with his joke, but was met with the continued silence of his companion.

"So... Um... Do you forgive me?"

At this Kurama finally looked up and regarded Kuwabara calmly.

"Kuwabara, I think its time that I explain to you the nature of my relationship with your sister."

* * *

><p>Keiko stood at the entrance of the department store. A light breeze fluttered her skirt and hair and she looked especially "keiko-ey". It wasn't a word, but it certainly was a vibe. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to ask her to go shopping after all. Upon noticing Shizuru's approach, the younger girl smiled and waved her arm excitedly. It almost made Shizuru embarrassed to watch. She really had made a mistake. Keiko was going to blow this whole thing out of proportion. Shizuru sighed inwardly.<p>

"Hey Shizuru! I'm glad you asked me to help you shop for your date. You-"

Before she could get out another word Shizuru had firmly placed her palm over her mouth. They stood like that for a while before Shizuru took some deep breaths and pulled her hand away.

"I told you on the phone Keiko, it's absolutely NOT a date. It's just... A dinner between friends."

Over the shock of being silenced, Keiko raised a skeptical eyebrow. It did not go unnoticed.

"I'm serious Keiko. It's not a date. You know that I'm not exactly a dating person."

"Well then who are you going shopping for?"

"Oh uh. You don't know him... that well."

"So why did you want me to come then?"

Shizuru turned away. For some one who acted like a love-sick puppy when it came to Yusuke, Keiko was surprisingly less naive than Shizuru had believed. It was making her even more nervous about her decision to ask for Keiko's help.

"Because- because I wanted to hang out. Do I really need a reason Keiko?"

"Well why don't you ever want to go out to lunch?"

"That's because I've been busy..."

"Busy with this mystery guy?

"Yes-... I mean..."

Keiko raised her eyebrow in suspicion again before spinning on her heel to face the door.

"Well come on then. You need clothes for your 'non-date' with the guy I don't know 'that well'."

Shizuru watched Keiko's retreating back before she too made her way into the department store, dreading every second. It wasn't long before Shizru had come to stand behind her that Keiko whipped a slinky black dress off the rack and held it up.

"What do you think of this?"

Shizuru absentmindedly raised a hand and ran her fingers over the smooth material. Keiko frowned to see her friend looked so unenthused.

"Shizuru."

Keiko's voice barely shook Shizuru from her daze and she looked up.

"What is it?"

Keiko huffed in annoyance and crossed her arms.

"I know something is bothering you so you might as well tell me. It's not like you to be so out of it."

"Well let's say that you and Yusuke were just friends and you wanted to be more-"

"More than friends?"

"No, not MORE than friends, just more... Friendly."

"Why ask me? I'm sure that you have more experience with that than I do.

Shizuru frowned. Keiko wasn't going to make this easy.

"I've gone out plenty of times, but you have more experience with..."

"You really like this guy, don't you?"

Shizuru remained silent and Keiko looked thoughtful for a moment before holding up the dress again.

"I would definitely wear this."

* * *

><p>La Vie Rose was not the kind of eating establishment that Shizuru was used to attending. For one, it was French and she rarely strayed from Japanese food. But that was a minor difference compared to everything else. If she did decided to eat out it was usually at a hole in the wall fast food place that made you afraid of what you'd find if you looked behind the counter. This place was not that. Well dressed servers gracefully navigated the spacious eating area and each table looked like the table cloth alone was more expensive than her monthly rent. Crystal chandeliers, expensively dressed patrons, and exorbitant prices only added to the feeling that she was out of place. It figured that Kurama would invite her to a place like this. It just oozed poise and elegance. Two things Kurama also oozed. Even though she had allowed Keiko to do her hair and make-up Shizuru still couldn't feel like any of it was real, that is until she noticed Kurama's bright red hair at a table not too far from where she stood. She smoothed her hands over the black jersey material of her dress and ran her fingers through her freshly curled hair before walking over to Kurama's table. Her red heels made a distinctive clicking noise against the wooden floors as she walked that made her sure he knew she was approaching, but he didn't turn around. Instead she was able to make it all the way to the table before he looked up from his menu.<p>

"You made it."

He said coolly. His gaze traveled lazily from her face to her feet and back up again before he gestured to the chair across from him.

"Please have a seat."

His tone was one of near indifference and Shizuru hesitantly pulled out her chair and sat down. Had she said something wrong? A waiter advanced to their table and attempted to hand Shizuru a menu. Just as he did so Kurama raised a hand.

"That won't be necessary. We're ready to order. We'll have the Supreme De Volaille. And please bring us your finest champagne."

The waiter glanced at Shizuru before taking Kurama's menu and leaving. As soon as his back turned Shizuru met Kurama's eyes with a deadly glare.

"What was that? I don't remember giving you permission to order for me. I don't even know what you ordered."

"which is exactly why I ordered for you. Besides, I thought we'd have more pressing matters to speak of."

"Like what?"

Shizuru could the familiar increase of her heart beat begin. This was silly. This was so silly, and yet she was waiting with baited breath to hear what he would say. Would this be where he confessed his feelings? The beginning of becoming more friendly?

"I no longer need your help with Yoko."

Shizuru's eyes narrowed.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I have the problem under control now and no longer will need to involve you."

"That's not-"

"Possible? Did you really think that the solution to my problem was contingent to your psychic abilities?"

Kurama's words lept out at Shizuru. They were almost biting. In a matter of seconds Shizuru's thoughts of her relationship with Kurama disappeared.

"So that's it. You just don't need me anymore?"

"I never needed you in the first place. You volunteered your services and I allowed you to help me."

Before Shizuru could fire back a young woman walked up behind Kurama and placed her hand on his shoulder. He turned around to see her and smiled for the first time that night.

"Kagura. What are you doing here?"

Kagura was tall, blonde, and beautiful. She was also wearing a dress similar to Shizuru's, but had probably cost twice as much. She stared at Shizuru before turning her attention back to Kurama.

"I remembered you would be here and I decided to stop by. Who's this?"

Kurama looked to Shizuru briefly before turning back to his visitor.

"This is the sister of my friend Kuwabara."

He turned back to Shizuru again.

"This is my girlfriend Kagura."

At that moment the waiter set the plates of food on the table. He looked curiously at the awkward looking situation of the table. The pretty blonde standing behind the man and the obviously surprised woman sitting across from him. He didn't look to long and quickly poured the champagne into two sparkling flutes and hurried away.

"The sister of your friend Kuwabara?"

Was her incredulous outburst.

"The gurlfriend you didn't mention shows up after I agree to meet you here and that's how you introduce me?"

She reached angrily for her champagne flute and downed the glass in one gulp.

"I wasn't aware that there was anything that needed to be added."

"How about the girl who's been worrying about you for the past few weeks?"

"I never asked you to worry about me."

Kurama managed to grind out from his grit teeth.

"Fine then."

In one fluid motion Shizuru had pushed herself up from the table and stood glaring angrily at Kurama.

"How about my name?"

Her eyes snapped to Kagura.

"I'm Shizuru."

Kurama's flute was snatched up and drained before Shizuru marched away from the table.


	7. 7

It had been the most peaceful sleep she'd had in a very long time. No dreams and no early morning wake ups. In fact she was sure it was the best sleep that she could ever remember having at all. She even felt well rested, a term that never applied to her. So why did she feel so awful? The last time she had dreamt about Kurama he had slipped through her fingers and she had come tumbling down. It was almost depressing how right she was sometimes. For once she wanted to be wrong about things like that, but she never was. Not that it mattered anymore. He had made it very clear that he no longer needed nor wanted her help. Whatever problems he had been having with Yoko had been resolved and he could now continue his elegant, secretive Kurama life and she could continue hers too. It was a good thing. That's what she had to tell herself. It wasn't like she'd be running all over town looking for him anymore, or finding him in her room in the middle of the night. She wouldn't have to wake up at 4:56 am to put on a pot of tea for when he came over at 5:00 in the morning. She could just sleep. She didn't have to buy anymore magazines for him either because it's not like he would be sitting on her couch reading them anymore. This was great. She finally had her normal life back and she didn't have to share it with anyone. She would have thanked Kurama were she not still so angry with him. If he didn't need her help anymore all he had to do was say so. She still couldn't figure out why he had acted so cold last night. It was if he was purposely trying to upset her. Though she really couldn't wrap her head around why he would want to do that.

Next to her, her cell phone buzzed on the night stand and for a moment her heart froze. The screen was lit and displaying numbers, but for that one moment all she could think was Kurama. Then the feeling passed and she released whatever breath she'd been unconsciously holding. It was a text from Yusuke of all people. She had half a mind to tell him to delete her number because he was always mass mailing lame jokes and forwarding chain mails, but a part of her hoped that it would be some kind of world-ending crisis. Anything to take her mind off her thoughts of the fox demon.

It was neither. Yusuke's text was typed in all caps and had five too many exclamation marks and smiley faces, but the gist of it was that he wanted to 'celebrate the anniversary of his return from the demon world', which put into normal people terms meant 'go to a bar and get incredibly, ridiculously wasted'. Shizuru let out a sigh as she massaged her temples. Despite the tough guy image he always tried to show people, Yusuke really was as immature as ever, and the way he typed his texts always made her want to slap him. However, it was a good excuse to go out and drink. Not that she needed a drink or anything. She was just determined to have fun now that her time was no longer being spent on a certain red haired man. In fact she had a red head of her very own.

* * *

><p>That's how Kazuma Kuwabara found himself in the same awkward predicament that he had before. He was at a diner. Shizuru was at a diner. They were at a diner, together, with duplicate orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a cheeseburger filling the distance between them. He didn't want to eat, he wanted to run as far away as possible lest he face whatever fury she had saved for him this time. He ran various situations in his head, attempting to find the one which had landed him in trouble this time, but he could only think of one. The couch. He had punched multiple holes in that old beat up couch and now she would punch multiple holes in his face. Heh heh. It would have been funny if it wasn't going to hurt so much. He cleared his throat and prepared to apologize.<p>

"Uh listen Shi, I-"

"So about Yusuke's party, we should go together."

Kuwabara watched as she casually sipped her milkshake.

"Well...that sounds great and non-weird, but I was already going to go...with...Yukina..."

Her head snapped up and her eyes narrowed dangerously into a glare.

"You'd rather go with your girlfriend than your own sister?"

"Well..."

Kuwabara began to shovel in handfuls of fries into his mouth in hopes of thinking of a new topic, but Shizuru crossed her arms and leaned back against the diner booth.

"I see. So you're really going to make me go alone. It figures that you would abandon me like this Kazuma."

"Abandon? What do you mean? You always go alone to things like this. It's just going to be the usual gang. Me, You, Yukina, Hiei, Yusuke, Botan, Keiko, Kurama-"

"What about Kagura, Kurama's girlfriend?"

Shizuru had perked up at the fox demons name and leaned forward suddenly, causing her companion to momentarily gag on a bite of fry.

"Uhhh girlfriend? What girlfriend? Kurama has a girlfriend?"

Kuwabara cursed his life as he sank down in his seat and anxiously nibbled on a fry. He had promised Kurama that he wouldn't speak about this with Shizuru, but he wasn't very good at lying to her. It made him feel bad, but he had promised... Shizuru leaned away from the table looking perplexed.

"I guess I'm the only one he told."

Almost instantly she shot up from the table and started to walk away. She needed to prepare.

"Thanks Kazuma. Finish my food. Oh and-"

Her head whipped around and she hit him with another glare.

"You're paying for my couch."

Kuwabara could only nod his head in acquiescence before she left. Scowling, he sank down in his seat with a fry in his mouth again. Why did he have to get stuck with such a weird sister?

* * *

><p>Shizuru took one last peek at her reflection in the bar window, before walking in. She didn't usually put in this much effort when it came to hanging out with Kazuma and company, but as soon as she entered the bar she was glad she did. She had been worried about her choice to wear a leather mini skirt and a red halter top, but felt relieved when she entered and saw girls dressed far more scantily than her. You couldn't really tell from the plain outside, but the Lotus bar looked more like a swanky night club than any bar she frequented. The walls had been painted a deep royal purple and were accented by hanging chandeliers made to look like smoldering red fires. The black floors shined in the dim light, and a trail of mosaic glass glittered seductively towards the bar, which was lit by cool green panels of light that had been inlaid beneath the counter. Shizuru followed the sparkling trail before sitting down on one of clear lacquer bar stools and looking around. Either everyone was late, or she was early. Either way she was alone.<p>

"Should I buy you a drink?"

A voice from behind her spoke and Shizuru swiveled in her stool to see an attractive man smiling at her.

"Should you?"

She questioned. She couldn't quite place it, but something about his perfectly tailored suit and black hair reminded her of someone she couldn't exactly place. Then a light bulb went on in her mind. If he had longer hair he could have been the mirror image of Sakyo. His charming grin widened to reveal pearly white teeth.

"Well, I could say 'can I', but we both know that I can. It's more a matter of if I should."

At that moment a very distinctive voice rang out through the bar even over the sound of the music coming from the dance area.

"Alright. Let's get this party started!"

Yusuke had entered the building. Shizuru turned back to the man apologetically.

"Sorry. I'm kind of predisposed."

He looked disappointed, but got up and walked away, leaving her to give her full attention to those who had just walked in. Yusuke, somehow already drunk, eagerly pulling Keiko to the bar. Kuwabara strutting proudly with his arm around Yukina and occasionally giving death glares to men who gave her appreciative once overs. Botan, also already drunk, arguing with Hiei over who knew what, and he trying to look unaffected when she too grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bar. Last, but not least, was Kurama. If she hadn't known better she would have assumed he was by himself. Compared to the vibrancy -and pre-drunken eagerness to become more drunk- of the rest of the group Kurama looked relaxed and at ease. He strolled behind everyone at an almost lazy pace, hands placed casually in the pockets of his fitted navy blue slacks. She knew who had chosen this place. Before she tore her unwilling eyes from Kurama she was greeted with boisterous shouts of hello as everyone took their seats near her. Yusuke and Botan wasted no time in ordering drinks, while Hiei looked on in poorly hidden disgust. Keiko on the other hand moved to stool closer to Shizuru, handing her a short glass filled with amber liquid.

"How soon do you think it will be before we get kicked out?"

Keiko asked gesturing towards the increasingly rowdy Botan and Yusuke.

"Not soon enough to keep Hiei from attacking Kazuma, unfortunately.

Shizuru looked over to her brother and Yukina who were now tucked away in a poorly lit corner. Keiko nodded in agreement. Shizuru looked up to see Kurama sipping from a drink of his own.

"It's him, isn't it?"

Keiko had asked the question, but it was more like she was stating a fact.

"Kurama is the guy you went out with the other night."

Shizuru downed her drink and waved the bartender over to order another. This time Vodka. She was on her third glass when she turned to Keiko again.

"Yeah, well, that was a one time thing."

Both girls nursed their respective drinks until a loud crash rang out and they both turned to see Yusuke had fallen off of his stool. Keiko rushed over to help him up and Shizuru ordered another Vodka. She had just emptied the glass when another was placed in front of her. She looked up to find the man from earlier wearing the same alluring smile.

"You looked like you had a little time on your hands so I decided to get you that drink we talked about."

"Thanks."

Was all Shizuru managed to say before throwing back the drink. Her gaze fell over to Kurama and for a moment his eyes locked onto hers. They stared at each other for only a fraction of a second before Kurama gave his attention to the busty brunette who had been drooling over him all evening. She then set her sights on the man again.

"Let's dance."

Shizuru took the mans hands and led him to the dance floor. He only stared at her in disbelief before he cracked a smile and pulled her close. They began to move against each other to the music and before long Shizuru found herself lost in the sensations of dancing with the stranger. The second song had just ended when a slightly slower song came on and they began to sway. Shizuru felt as if she was in a haze and only the feeling of someone's body pressing against the small of her back and a pair of arms slipping around her torso and coming to wrap around her waist barely registered before she realized that the man was still dancing in front of her, not behind her. Warm breath tickled the skin on the nape of her neck and Kurama's voice poured into her ear.

"You're drunk."

She huffed angrily and tried to wiggle out of Kurama's hold, but stopped when she felt herself wiggling against his solid chest.

"And your point is? Last time I checked I was an adult. Where's Kagura?"

She could have sworn she felt a chill before the feeling melted away.

"She couldn't make it."

He answered simply, as if the question bored him. Shizuru now noticed that he too was rocking with her back and forth to the steady rhythm. It occurred to her that her previous dance partner hadn't seemed to notice that he was now sharing her. Kurama's arms tightened around her.

"Don't worry about him. Look at me."

Was his voice deeper? It couldn't be. Shizuru turned around slowly. Hazel clashed with yellow.


	8. 8

Hazel clashed with yellow and the feeling was electric and instantaneous. It was like her whole body had been magnetized and she was being drawn to him by a force that was partly foreign and partly her own desire to be near him. Letting go of the stranger, she allowed her weight to fall back into Yoko's chest and he gripped her even tighter. She knew that he was dangerous, that at that moment Kurama was not in control. She knew that if he wanted to he could kill her in a matter of seconds before any of the others would even think to check on them. Even so she couldn't feel any fear. Inside of the alcoholic cloud that had settled over her all of her senses had been numbed. Her typical rationality had all but deserted her, leaving her feeling uninhibited by the situation. Still, this was wrong. She knew this was wrong, but she couldn't bring herself to pull away from him. She felt as if she was being pulled in two different directions. It felt better than she had expected to be held by Kurama, but at the same time that his breath tickled her neck and his scent surrounded her, the flash off his silver hair told her that this wasn't Kurama, not really.

"You know, You can't have us both."

She froze. Her previous haze dissipated before her eyes. She jerked away from his arms, but they encircled her waist and cradled her gently against him.

"Or did you think that this game could continue? That you could love him from afar by pulling me close?"

His words possessed a chilled, mocking tone, and she could almost feel him smile at her shock.

"You're wrong. I wouldn't-"

He swung her around to face him and she stared into his great yellow eyes as he stooped to match her eye level.

"I'm no longer Kurama, Shizuru. You of all people should know that. It's either him or me."

He paused and studied her face before letting a tapering finger trail down the side of her cheek. She watched him closely. She had never been so close to Yoko before. She found that rather than looking scary, he looked alluring. His yellow twinkling with an almost seductive manner.

"Ultimately it's your choice. Just choose wisely."

He leaned in further and closed the quickly dwindling distance between them by pressing his lips to hers.

Shizuru awoke with a jolt and bolted upright from her sleeping position. Her fingers frantically probed her lips, searching for any trance of cold that could be felt. Her body felt out of place. It had all seemed so real. As if only seconds before she truly had been mere inches away from him. He had said something strange though. What did he mean when he said she 'couldn't have them both'? Did she even want him? One thing was sure though, Yoko was becoming emboldened in the times and places he decided to take over. To make matters worse, the amount of Kurama she was able to sense still within him had faded to nearly none. She knew that time was running out for Kurama. If Yoko succeeded, there was a chance that the Kurama she knew would fade away forever. It was a thought to horrible too imagine, but at the same time she recalled the kiss from the night before. It had made her feel things she didn't understand. She knew that Yoko could have been using her feelings against her to sway her to his side, but she also knew that he could have killed her on numerous accounts. Instead he was giving her a choice. Him or Kurama. Shizuru fell backwards onto the bed and closed her eyes. It was all too much to think about first thing in the morning. She pulled the covers up to her face and snuggled against the warm bed. It smelled so good. Almost like a green house filled with exotic flowers.

She opened her eyes. This was not her bed and this was not her room. Throwing the comforter from her and springing from the bed Shizuru looked around the foreign room. It was neat and spartan. A single black desk and chair, a king sized bed, a well stocked book shelf, and a lamp were all that decorated it. He didn't even own a tv. Her attention was moved from her surroundings to her body as she felt the goose flesh raise on her skin. Her outfit from the night before did little to shield her from Kurama's frigid apartment. Not too mention the fact that she didn't exactly relish the idea of strutting around Kurama with as much skin she was showing. After searching a little, Shizuru noticed a closet across from the master bath and opened it to find a black silk robe hanging from a hanger. She studied herself in the mirror and tried to fight the tingly feelings she got when she let herself think that she was wearing Kurama's robe. She was finally going to get some answers today. No more half truths, no more lies, and no more of his stupid pride.

She found Kurama seated at his kitchen table. Eyes apparently glued to a newspaper. He barely cast her a glanced before returning to whatever he was pretending to find so interesting.

"You found my robe I see. It suits you."

She eyed him closely before pulling out a chair and seating herself across from him.

"Thanks. Its a little bit chilly in here, don't you think?"

He flipped a page and kept his eyes down.

"Is it? I hadn't noticed."

Shizuru leaned forward and pulled the paper from him hands. She folded it neatly and tucked it away before crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair. His eyes came up to meet her fixed gaze.

"Why am I here Kurama?"

He too folded his arms and leaned back before answering.

"You passed out and everyone else was too drunk, or passed out themselves to bring you home. You're here because I don't have they key to your apartment."

"That never stopped you before. Are you sure you are the one who brought me here? Wasn't it actually Yoko?"

Kurama said nothing, but continued to meet her stare unflinchingly. Shizuru continued.

"Haven't you been lying to me about what was going on? After all, I'm pretty sure he knocked me out when he..."

Shizuru trailed off and looked away angrily. She didn't want Kurama to know just yet how his situation had been complicated by her feelings. His eyes narrowed suspiciously. He had picked up on the fact that she was with holding information from him.

"When he what?"

Shizuru bit down on her bottom lip as she tried to think of something to tell him. Suddenly her chair was yanked around to face Kurama. He looked imploringly into her face.

"He did what, Shizuru?"

The look on his face made her uncomfortable. He looked genuinely worried about her. She was forgetting that she had been the one who was supposed to ask the questions.

"He.. Kissed me..."

Kurama was silent. His face contorted in confusion. She decided it was time to change the subject.

"Why didn't you tell me how bad it had gotten Kurama? Before it was just you in Yoko's body, but now... Now it's like you're two completely different people. If I had known I would never have stopped trying to help you. "

Kurama face grew dark as he left her and walked to his couch. Falling backwards with a sigh into the leather, he stared at the ceiling.

"I know. That's why I lied. I knew he was getting stronger. I couldn't be sure of myself around you anymore. I can't say that I'm surprised that he kissed you either. It's how he is, or should I say how I used to be. When you started trying to help me it made him jealous, I think. He wants to take my place so naturally he would also wish to take the things that I have. I just didn't know that he had become so fearless of being found out."

Shizuru moved to the couch and sat next to him on its edge.

"Things? Since when did I become a thing that you have?"

A ghost of a smirk passed over his face before leaving it in darkness again.

"He's a demon, but he's still a fox. An animal. In fox terms you would technically be my property. That's probably why he kissed you and brought you here. To show me that he had claimed you."

"But what about Kagura? Isn't she more in the 'your property' zone? I am just the sister of your friend, remember?"

Kurama chuckled ruefully.

"I wish I could forget. I felt awful having to treat you that way. Kagura was just a cover. I thought that if I could make you jealous, then you would be less inclined to make sure that I was telling the truth about Yoko."

Shizuru could feel her face growing hot and quickly grimaced in the hopes of hiding her blush.

"Why would I ever be jealous of her?"

Kurama looked at her seriously and sat up. His green eyes sparkled with an emotion that she couldn't quite place. A spark shot through her finger tips and she looked down to find his hand had somehow come to be placed firmly over hers. His face inched closer to her at an almost painfully slow rate and her beat quickened in response. As he got closer her body instinctively moved back until she was pushed up against the couch's arm rest. Kurama reached out and cupped her chin gently as he continued to move in. His eyes had closed and she allowed herself to study him in the last few milliseconds that dragged by in what felt like eternity. She was able to notice his hair was loose from the usual rose that pinned it. It looked wild and she realized that she liked him a little messy. He was still in his sleeping clothes and his loose night shirt dipped to give her a view of his pale chest. It distracted her briefly from how close he was now. So impossibly close. Her mind was racing to process everything and she could feel his breath rush out against her lips. His own lips nearly brushing, nearly touching hers. In the final moments she recalled what had happened the previous night. A vision of Yoko flashing before her eyes.

"No!"

She hadn't even realized that she had pushed him away until she saw her hands on his chest and the saddened look on his face. Whatever atmosphere had previously surrounded them, now evaporated into the air without a trace. They were both left in a deafening silence. Kurama made the first move and moved away from her. He mumbled an apology and went to stand near the kitchen table once again. This time with his back facing her. Shizuru let her arms fall limply to their sides and stared into the empty space where Kurama had just been. It had all happened so suddenly. She hadn't meant to push him away and yet... She could feel Kurama. He felt guilty, but mixed in with that guilt he was questioning himself. She could guess what he was wondering. Why had she accepted Yoko's kiss, but not his? Neither spoke as she stood up from the couch and moved towards the door. The robe slipped off her shoulders and fell into a crumpled heap. She put on her shoes before walking out and closing the door behind her. In the hall way she felt her legs weaken and she fell back against his door before pushing herself up again. The walk to the elevator allowed her sometime to clear her head. She knew she needed answers. She needed to figure out how to stop Yoko before it was too late. The fact that he had kissed her didn't mean anything. Just that she had allowed her self to be vulnerable to his tricks. It had cost her Kurama already. She didn't want it to cost her again. The glossy doors opened before her and she stepped inside the elevator. She felt determined to help Kurama now more than ever. The tiny sliver of doubt in the back of her mind was ignored. She didn't want Yoko. She had to keep telling herself that.


	9. 9

Her surroundings were blurred and she felt a sick unease settle into the bottom of her stomach. This was wrong. This was so wrong. For the first time in her life she actually felt unsure of what she was feeling. She had never had the type of spirit power that allowed her to fight demons like Kuwabara, and she definitely couldn't tell the future, but what she always know to be her true power was her ability to sense things. She had an intuition that was never wrong. Or at least not until now. The sense of doubt that plagued her mind was unlike anything she had ever experienced. Without her even considering the possibility, Yoko had deprived her of the one thing she had come to rely on. She was seeing Yoko where she should have been seeing Kurama and feeling things for Yoko that she had thought she only felt for Kurama. The world passed by in jagged edges and uneven lines and she didn't even know where she was going. She felt her self losing balance, but was spared a fall by a firm grip on her forearm. She turned to face the fuzzy outline of a man. She struggled to focus her vision and eventually found her self face to face with Yusuke. He was making some kind of weird grimace and she didn't feel patient enough to deal with his impending concern. "let go" she managed to growl, before attempting to shake free of his hold.

"Well if you say so." Shizuru felt herself falling forward again and this time she fell to her knees. She turned to find Yusuke struggling to hold in his laughter. "What the hell Yusuke?" No longer able to contain himself, Yusuke threw back his head and let out a laugh that only made Shizuru more angry. She pushed herself up from the ground and stumbled forward again. Like before she was stopped by a grip on her arm and like before she turned around to see Yusuke.

"Geez don't be so mad Shizuru. I was only trying to help. You look a little..."

"I look a little what?" she snapped.

"Out of it. Is something wrong?" He had stopped laughing and was now looking at her with a critical eye. Yusuke didn't typically have the greatest ability to sense things, but she could tell that he knew something was wrong with her.

Shizuru huffed angrily before turning her back to Yusuke.

"Don't worry about it" she said as she stalked off. She had hoped her icy demeanor would be enough to make him lose interest, but these hopes were dashed once she realized he was trailing behind her and quickly catching up to her.

"I know there's been something going on between you and Kurama lately."

She eyed him warily. Not wanting to let her surprised show on her face. She hadn't realized that it had become common knowledge that she had a special relationship with Kurama, but it seemed that they weren't as discrete about it as she thought. Although it probably had been pretty obvious that there was at least a little tension between them after the incident at the bar. She couldn't blame it solely on Yoko's behavior either. After having one too many drinks she had been feeling a little more willing to give into the fox demon that she had been willing to admit. Which was how she found herself in this new situation with Kurama. She had come so close to get him to open up to her about the extent of Yoko's control and now... Now she would would be lucky if he was even willing to let her back into his apartment, let alone tell her anything. She hadn't meant to push him away like that. In fact, she wanted just the opposite. All this time she had been trying to restrain herself from allowing her feelings for Kurama to get in the way of her helping him. If the circumstances had been different she probably would have been the one it initiate the kiss. The memory of how close he had been to her made heat seep into her abdomen and twist her insides into uncomfortable knots. She could even feel her face grow warm. It was at this moment that Yusuke grabbed her arm, halting her thoughts and her walking, and turned her to face him. He stared suspiciously into her face. Reflexively, she scowled and yanked her arm away.

"Oh buzz off Yusuke. If you're just here to be nosey and annoying you might as well go hang out with Kuwabara instead."

"Hey! I resent that! I might actually be able to help if you quit being so pissy you know."

She mulled it over. Yusuke was far more experienced in dealing with the spirit world than her. Maybe he could be of some use.

"Well I've been having trouble sleeping lately and it seems that sometimes my dreams find their way into reality. Got any spirit detective advice for me?"

Yusuke paused. His face looked kind of blank. He seemed to be thinking. She figured it would stump him, but she couldn't help trying. She was about to walk away again when Yusuke started to speak.

"Well... I'm not sure what your freaky dreams have to do with being a spirit detective, but if I was up against a spirit screwing around with my dreams, I guess I'd have to beat him in my dreams too."

"Beat him in a dream? Could Yoko really be beat that way? It did make sense. Yoko seemed to be strongest when Kurama was asleep and he had even appeared in a few of her dreams. If Kurama fought and killed Yoko in one of his dreams, maybe the part of Yoko that lived within him would die too."

Yusuke was staring at her again, but this time she smiled at him.

"I guess there is a little bit going on up there after all. I knew Kuwabara was smart for keeping you around."

"Bold fashion statement by the way! Last night's club wear, this morning!" He shouted after her.

She had forgotten that she was still wearing the outfit from the night before, but she couldn't worry about that now and with that thought she dashed off towards Kurama's building, heels and all.

As she pushed open the doors to Kurama's building, she forced herself to ignore the surprised stares of people she pushed aside and raced for the elevator. Her heart was beating fast and her head was spinning. She didn't know why, but she felt she had to get back to Kurama as soon as possible. She had to tell him how to defeat Yoko before it was too late. She wasn't even sure if he would be willing to listen to her but, she knew she had to try. Her fingers tapped desperately against the up elevators button, but it seemed to be moving slower instead of faster. When it finally dinged and slid open she didn't hesitate to rush in and press Kurama's floor. Before she knew it she was running as fast as she could down the hall. Kurama's door seemed to be an eternity away, but she reached it quickly and began pounding on the door. She expected him to ignore her. She expected him to keep her outside until he decided she had been punished enough, but she also knew that time was running out for the both of them. The urgency made her feel unusually desperate. It felt like years had past since she had last seen him instead of hours. How much could happen in that amount of time? When door pounding stopped working she resorted to jiggling the knob in an attempt to force her way inside. The harder she shook though the more steadily the door seemed to stand against her attempts. Finally she sunk down to her knees in exhaustion. Surely there had to be a way in? Although it was strange for Kurama to leave her outside for so long. As she was thinking of other ways to get inside the door creaked open, revealing Kurama's empty apartment. She got up slowly and made her way in right before the door slammed shut behind her. A strange fog had begun to fill the room and Shizuru knew before she felt his icy stare on her back, it was Yoko.

Turning to face him she found Yoko leaning casually against the door. At least he looked casual. She suspected this was actually to show her that she wouldn't be able to leave until he was done with her. She was trapped.

"I didn't realize you were so eager to see me again. I guess our last meeting wasn't enough for you?"

A ghost of a smirk graced his lips and for the first time Shizuru was able to say that his features were overwhelmingly foxlike. Especially the cunning glitter of his yellow eyes. This was a being who was very clearly not Kurama.

"I didn't come here to see you." She spat out angrily. "Let me speak to him!"

Yoko let out a dark chuckle and even managed to appear genuinely amused, but she knew better.

"Well, someone is in a mood. What's wrong Shizuru? Don't you want to kiss me anymore? I assure you that I'm much better at it than Kurama."

It was her turn to scoff at the comment.

"That's it isn't it? That's why you keep appearing to me this way. Not just because I'm psychic. Because..."

His eyes sparkled dangerously. He was hanging on her every word.

"Because what? If if you know so much you should say it."

"You... You..."

"I... I... What!? Spit it out!"

Shizuru flinched instinctively. It was unlike Yoko to raise his voice. He liked to seem calm at all times. For him to show this much interest in what she was saying, she could tell she hit a nerve.

Taking a deep breath, Shizuru looked Yoko straight in his eyes.

"You want me, don't you? You want me to be yours... instead of Kurama's."

"Hn. That's what you think, is it? Well it's an interesting theory."

Yoko lazily pushed himself off the door and took a step towards her. Every fiber of her being was screaming that she take a step back, but she didn't move. She didn't want to show him how much she feared him. Eventually he was very close and began to circle her. Arms folded over his chest, without even looking towards her. She could tell she was right about what she was saying and continued.

"Actually it's what I know. Kurama was right. You want what he has, and that includes me. That's why you keep showing yourself to me. But you'll never have me, because I also know what Kurama hasn't realized. Once you've completely gotten rid of Kurama you'll kill me."

There was silence. Yoko had stopped walking directly in front of her. He simply looked straight ahead. Suddenly, his lips split into a wide, sickening grin. He was laughing. Laughing so hard that his shoulders shook with the force of it.

"Kill you?"

He asked in mock surprise. The words sounding silly and childlike smashed between his laughter.

"I'd much rather play with you for a bit. Who knows. Maybe I'd even keep you around."

His laughter cut off abruptly and he became serious again. It made her wonder if his laughter had even been real, or if he was just toying with her.

"Would you like that Shizuru?"

A long cold finger gracefully traced the outline of her lips. She had to act fast.


End file.
